From the Depths Pt six

Im still finding old bits and pieces of writing from ten years ago. 
Some I think is actually pretty good, others are more like "what the hell was that!"
It seems for some time I did struggle with SI, though I seem to have gotten past that. Now I just yell, a lot. 

Temptation.... it sits there in its little box.... all sharp and shiny....

must fight... must not give in

why do you call me... there seems no reason.... but there is, isnt there....

your all nice and sharp and shiny sitting snug in your little box....

whispering to me from the dark corners of my mind....

must resist.... or maybe i should give in....

let you out.... feel something.... other then you clawing at my insides....

maybe.....


There are times when in are deepest despair we hear things from the void. At least I do. This one was more the result of a serious mistake on my part. Also ties into the cutting as well, while it was not what triggered it it deepened the need for it. We really do hurt those closest to us the deepest...

I foresee.. a loss
I foresee.. the end.. of everything you hold dear
I foresee..

A time of tears
A time of blood

I foresee.. a loss
I foresee.. an end to everything i love

A time of tears
A time of blood
A time of death

I foresee..

The end.. 

From the vault of my memory it seems ten years ago was a very intense period of my life. I dont think I have been that open to the other side since. Nor had as much going on with several groups of people either. Things are vastly different, more quiet, less drama, and just as busy it seems what with now having spawn to deal with. This bit of scribbling was near the end of that year.

The Darkness calls
and I want to return
but i know that i can not
for the future it needs me/us
so the Darkness
it whispers of things
meant to be, meant to happen
and better futures
then we can imagine
just be true
true to the Darkness
and true to oneself
and the future
it will be yours
just
be patient... 

I think in some ways we may still be waiting, thing again maybe not and we just have yet to realize it.

I think this will be it for now, maybe in a week I will have found more or perhaps I will try to write of something else.